Mostly Connected with a little Disconnect

I've spent the last two plus weeks bonding with four Sedgwick grandkids and five Taskers. I've been a full time mom again and am reminded how much I love being a part-time grandma most of the time. Full-time is exhausting; part-time is exhilarating! Full-time means lots of stinky diapers to change; part time means you just hand the stinky kid back to his mom! Full-time means you have to get up early; part-time means you can sleep in a little. Full-time means you have to cook three meals, and wash several loads of laundry, and clean house; part time means you can eat out, the laundry can wait, and so can the house! It's been good though, and I feel reconnected to these precious kids that live so far away from Georgia. I am also amazed at how good my grandkids are - they are helpful, happy, obedient - handsome and beautiful. I adore them all. There has been a downside to being gone from Georgia for nearly three weeks: Ella has been asking where 'Uncle Becky' is. In the process of reconnecting it looks like I've also been disconnected and renamed. I'm heading back to Georgia in two days and am going to reclaim my status as, 'Grandma Becky!' Here's some fun pictures from all of the connection time.

Here, There, and Everywhere

I just survived a California earthquake....or at least a tremor!  I've only felt what I felt tonite one other time in my life and that was when we lived in Northern California from 1977-80.  at that time I was standing in the living room of a friend's home when the chandelier began to swing and the floor to move beneath my feet and all I could do was 'stand' there and hope the end wasn't coming!  Well tonight I'm in California watching four very cute, very busy, very creative Sedgwick grandkids and I was sitting in a big comfy chair reading to them when all of a sudden my chair started to shake and all I could do was 'sit' there and hope the end wasn't coming!  It is a completely strange, helpless situation.  But I'm alive to write the tale, so the end didn't come!   

Gary and I came out to visit Dave and Jessica earlier in the week and enjoyed time together with everyone here until yesterday when all of the adults left: Gary back to GA and Dave/Jessica to Seattle for a few days.  Dave is doing a Myers-Brigg certification - does that ring a bell?  Think : Jim Tasker - Dominican Republic - Myers Brigg - finding out that most of us are opposites of our spouses, except Jordan and Amanda who were just alike!   This trip to California has come with some strokes of good luck.   Jessica shared with us two of her free United passes that she got last year after the family reunion in CO when her flight was overbooked.   When we arrived for our flight last Tuesday,  it was overbooked, too, so we volunteered to give up our seats.  It wasn't a big sacrifice since they put us on a flight that was a non-stop and got us to our destination faster than the original flight, plus Gary got to upgrade to first class, and we each got two free round-trip tickets for future use.  As if that wasn't enough, Gary's flight home yesterday was overbooked, he gave up his seat, got upgraded to first class on the next plane, and got another free RT ticket!  We flew out on free tickets, got three free tickets in return.   This is better than Claire's coupon shopping at Walgreens!

I love coming to California even if one risks her life in so doing.  One of these days the 'BIG ONE' that's been predicted for so long will probably happen, but maybe not until the Second Coming and if we are prepared, we'll look forward to that, right?  It is so beautiful here, the weather is perfect, and San Juan Capistrano is sort of like what Dave described as a 'cowboy town.'   It is small enough to get to Costco in seven minutes and big enough to have it's own character-filled down town that hasn't changed much since Dave was kid growing up here.   No skyscrapers block your view and the town is centered around the San Juan Mission, which is described as the 'jewel of the California missions.'  It's easy to see why the Sedgwicks love it here. 

We loved having Julie and Beau home for several days - long enough to go to Cafe Pig twice, a Braves game, Fox Theatre, the Allreds Fun Farm, and several days at the beach.  I'm glad Amy came along with Beau so we had a good excuse to 'play.'  We had a crowd in Palm Coast and had to spread out a bit between the Cinnamon Beach condo and Tidelands on the Intracoastal.   It could be our last big group trip with the condo getting close to being sold, and Tidelands on the market.  It has been fun to always have room for everyone that wanted to go if they were willing to 'pay the toll' at the bridge and ferry back and forth.  Claire, Emily, and Amanda were willing - so were Lincoln, Ella, Cooper, Luke, Ethan, and Jonah.   We had a good time sunning by day, and playing games by night.  Then when we all went to bed, Beau and Amy would finally get some privacy!   Amy seemed right at home with all of the company, the kids, the noise, and the Jewkes chatter that always happens when the girls get together! 

Julie put her special touch on Mother's Day and made it just very memorable for her mom, lucky ME!  She cooked a gourmet breakfast under a the scope of a very big, artistic Mother's Day greeting that she also created.   It was the perfect gift!  In fact, the entire was wonderful from beginning to end.  I got some very clever cards, one very delicious chocolate-caramel apple, a steak dinner prepared by Jake Sr., and no attention at all from Jake Jr.   I felt honored to be asked to be the speaker in church, but that is always an 'ordeal' beforehand, so I'm glad I don't get asked often!   I think I forgot to mention the most important thing of all: I LOVE being a mother!  I love being a grandmother!  I'm convinced this is the BEST season of life!

This coming week I'll head back to Georgia and find my husband, and together we'll go visiting again...this time to Colorado and the Tasker household.  We are the official household/grandkid caretakers while Jim and Jenn spend a week in Hawaii!  We seem to be in demand  lately and we are having a great time going here, there, and everywhere!  

Marathon and More

With the Atlanta temple closing on July 1 for major renovations, I've been going weekly for the past couple of months and have on occasion run into these two characters who try very hard to distract me. See if you recognize them!
Gary is overseas but but will be home later this week, just in time to enjoy Julie, Jeremiah and his girlfriend, Amy, who we are certainly looking forward to getting to know better. Beau is going to show Amy around town, starting with a Braves/Cardinals game on Wednesday evening and a Broadway musical at the Fox on Friday. Their first request, though, was to go to the beach and since we just happen to have a place right on the beach, we'll spend a few days with them there. I hope Julie brings her scissors and clippers to shape a few of us up. She just spent a week at the Taskers taking care of the kids while Jenn, Jim, and London went to Boston for the famous Marathon that Jim ran in. Claire, Jessica, Emily and Ethan, Rachel and Lauren, and myself were the official cheering squad, complete with T-shirts that read on the front: J. Crew, Boston Marathon 2009, and on the back some clarification on the crew: Jim's CREW meaning
Courageous Runner Endless Waiting. Courageous because Jim was determined to qualify without having to ever run on Sunday which is quite a feat since most marathons are on Sunday.
Runner because that is just what he is, rain or shine. Endless because that is what the miles feel like when your body wants to shut down, or maybe it is because Jenn feels like Jim's passion for running is endless, with no end in sight! Waiting for a few years to qualify took patience, persistence, and a fair amount of money! Whatever, the CREW was thrilled to be able to go, the CREW had a fabulous time, the CREW fell in love with Boston, the CREW wants to go again and hopes someone in the family qualifies again! In our spare time we rode the trolley all over historic Boston, jumped off at Cambridge to go to church, rode the subway to Harvard to get a picture of London in front of John Harvard, enjoyed some tasty deli's,

and mostly just had fun being together in a beautiful, historic city cheering on our man, Jim. Gary and I lived in the township of Northboro, MA way back in 1976 when we just had Jennefer and Josh so this trip for me was a trip down memory lane.
Gary had business in Tampa earlier in the month, so instead of flying he drove and I went right along with him. Jordan, Amanda, and Jonah came over as well and while the guys had meetings, we checked out Costco, the giant horses at PF Changs, and a few other things inbetween. Jonah wasn't feeling great so we restrained ourselves!
I don't believe I've shown off Baby Amelia yet who worked her way right into my heart while I was in Albuquerque. Now she has worked her way right into Jake's heart while he is in Albuquerque! Oliver's place in our hearts was already secure before his baby sister's arrival.
I know some people come to Hickory Farm in the to fish and fish and fish but end up without a whole lot of luck. Then there are other people that fish and fish and fish and end up with a lot of luck. There are some BIG FISH in our lakes, that is for sure.
April is a celebratory month for us. Gary always has a birthday (#61) and we always have an anniversary (#36). There are a few other family birthdays, too: Jason who doesn't want his age posted, and Caleb who does want his age posted (7....next year a big one for him).

A Tribute to my sister, Launa

March 2009 - Becky, Luke, Launa
Launa has always been and will forever be two years older than me.
I spent a lot of time in my growing up years trying to figure out how I could close that age gap. I wanted to do the things she was doing and have the friends that she had. When I reached second grade and had Mrs. Hart, who was also a member of our church, for my teacher, I thought maybe my chance to time-jump had come and that she would let me ‘skip’ a grade putting me one year closer to my ‘idol-ed’ big sister. Unfortunately, Mrs. Hart’s theme was always to use my own ‘initiative’ rather than relying on her mercy to speed up my academic age. Obviously, I didn’t have enough initiative because Launa still graduated two years before I did, and now many years later is more than years ahead of me in her wisdom and gentleness of spirit: attributes that aren’t measured in earthly years.
Growing up in Idaho Falls, Launa blazed the trail for me. She was beautiful, talented, popular. I would introduce myself as Becky Heninger, but more importantly, I would always add that I was Launa Heninger’s sister. She could always make her hair look so perfectly ‘stylish.’ My hair usually looked perfectly ‘boyish’ despite my best efforts. We both took dancing lessons – Launa was a natural and I fumbled my way along. She was always the better horsewoman – I just got lucky because I had a better trained horse. Launa ran for school offices and won. She was secretary of the 9th grade. When I reached 9th grade, I was an ‘also ran’ for the same office. She was homecoming princess in the same grade – I didn’t even make the cut. I remember watching her ride the float in the Homecoming Parade and dreaming big dreams for doing the same.
Despite my setbacks, I didn’t give up. I still wanted to be just like Launa. Years later that is still my quest. Launa was president of the Young Women in her ward, and when I was able to be just like her in that respect, she was my resource and inspiration. I think I copied all of her files and ideas and she generously shared them. Every time I am around her I realize just how much there is to Launa. She has allowed herself to be taught and molded through her life experiences. I remember her joking once that if trials count for wisdom, then she should be one of the smartest people around! Well, I think she is. I remember being with her in Oregon when our older sister, Susan, was sick. Launa just intuitively knew the right thing to do and say to comfort Sue. I thought to myself, ‘When I am sick, I want Launa to come and take care of me.’
When Launa has hard times, she still maintains her sense of humor which invariably makes the tough going a little easier. She called the Nelson family’s last Thanksgiving together before Bill left, ‘The last supper!’ She gave me some great counsel on marriage a few years ago when we were driving to Canada for Dominion Day. I asked her how she was able to manage the difficulties in her marriage and still be happy, and she wisely said, ‘I choose to focus on Bill’s positive qualities.’
Lately I’ve been asking Launa how she is able to have the energy to be help raise young grandchildren at time in her life when she should be pampering herself – taking it a little easier. I want to have Launa’s energy, her compassion, her love. Launa loves her children and loves their children and wants the best for them – and she is willing to be an instrument in that process. Launa has the gift of charity – you see it in her actions and you see it in her eyes. She has received His image in her countenance and in who she has become. She is someone I love to be around – she is someone I love deeply. I hope I can be just like her someday!

Weekly Reader

I was reading in church this morning, waiting for the meeting to start (miracle of miracles, we were ten minutes early!) and came across this counsel from Brigham Young: ‘Render the earth so pleasant that when you look upon your labors you may do so with pleasure, and that angels may delight to come and visit your beautiful locations….’ Who, in all of your world, does that remind you of? Gary ~Dad ~Poppy came right to my mind and I imagined the angels visiting Hickory Hill farm in the form of all of you from Jim the eldest to Amelia Grace, the youngest!

We were lucky to have some of those angels visit a couple of weeks ago: Jordan, Amanda and Jonah the King, even though right now he is just a very handsome prince.

We enjoyed every minute of the long weekend they were in GA and I promised myself that we had to make this happen more often. They only live in the neighboring state of Florida and not some faraway place like Dallas, Albuquerque, Denver, or California. They enjoyed time on the trampoline, canoe, and tire swing, and if they had arrived a couple of weeks later they could have done an azalea walk through Gary’s gardens which are just waiting to burst forth: quite a contrast from his life in sandy, dusty, dry Saudi.

I know he is missing his yard and getting it in perfect shape for spring, but it will be beautiful nonetheless. He is missing his family even more, and will head straight to Albuquerque without even a layover in ATL on his way back from Saudi Arabia this Wednesday – anxious to meet the latest member of the Jewkes clan, Amelia Grace, #23. I was lucky enough to arrive at the Bell home in the knick of time exactly one week ago since Amelia decided to come early depriving Rebecca and I of a day together to get prepped before her scheduled C-section. I arrived late on Sunday night, Rebecca and Christian left for the hospital a couple of hours later when her water broke, so when Oliver first saw me the next morning, I was sure he would start crying at the ‘stranger’ in his house. As he peeked around the corner from his bedroom, I saw him and said, ‘Oliver, it’s grandma Becky!’ To that, he ran right to me and gave me a big hug. The perfect way to melt a grandma’s heart. We’ve been bonded every since, taking long 2-3 hour walks in the mornings interspersed with stops at playparks along the way. So far, we have found six parks within walking distance of his home! The afternoons have been consumed with trips to the hospital to see mom and baby sister until Ollie would become too rowdy, and then it was ‘home again, home again, jiggety jig.’ He is such a delightful, entertaining little boy and happy 95% of the time, obedient 96% of the time. Rebecca came home Thursday which gives us more ‘baby time’ until Oliver wants something, and then it is, ‘Put your baby down right now and come here!’

I love the beautiful, sunny days and cool, desert nights of ABQ, and I love the temple that is just a hop, jump, and skip away. I was able to do a session last week and look forward to a session or two this week with Gary. For the weekend, we all plan to visit Taos and Santa Fe, and have a ‘spend the nighter’ in the latter. It’s such fun to be with the Bells – lots of good conversation, delightful company, clear play movies, and time to just be lazy….and hang out at play parks!

We had my angel sister, Launa, visit us at Hickory Hill Farm, too – squeezed inbetween the FL Jewkes and the ABQ Bells timewise. What a fun time we had together visiting, playing games, watching movies, going to the temple, eating good food, and just re-connecting. I love and honor her for the wonderful woman/sister/friend person she is. She often jokes that if trials make one wise then she should be among the wisest of the wise!

I’ve discovered (more truthfully, was led to the discovery by Emily and Claire) the perfect place to take visiting angels/grandkids when they come to Hickory Hill: Noah’s Ark ~ a home for animal rehabilitation right in our very own Spalding County. I was along with Lincoln and Ella when they saw tigers, lions, bears and ostriches; pot belly pigs, leopards, llamas, and goats.

I’m looking forward to a Fia ‘overniter’ and we are for sure going to Noah’s Ark. But before then, the Fia’s (Sofia and Lilian) are going to Holland for two weeks with their mom and brother, and maybe their dad if he can figure a way to get out of work. It will be Jasper’s first trip abroad and he’ll get to meet his great grandma who is celebrating her 80^th birthday. Safe travels to that family. And safe travels to the Tasker family who are enroute to Sundance today for a week of snow and sledding, skiing and sleeping. Jim will ski – Jenn will sleep. She is worn out from taking care of sick kids non-stop for about six weeks running so she deserves uninterrupted sleep if that is what her heart/body demand. Jake Jr. is joining them on his birthday this Tuesday, March 24 (to watch the kids while Jenn sleeps maybe???), and will spend the rest of the week in UT before heading to ABQ for a new job (well, his ‘old job back’ might be more correct) and a transfer to University of New Mexico for school. Jake’s motto will be ‘Work by Day, Study by Night….never, never, never give up!’ Oliver is so excited that Uncle Jake is going to be rooming next to him once again. Jake is definitely the guy the kids all love. Happy Birthday to my beloved youngest son who is officially turning 21 even though he’s been acting it for a while now! And late birthday wishes to Jim – the patriarch of the Hickory Hill Farm angels.

Julie is traveling back to UT today after a week with the Sedgwicks in California. Dare I say she was suspended from school for a week? I’m glad she’s an adult and gets to take complete responsibility for her life. She’s had a good time and thinks suspension is the way to go. Lucy kept her busy playing games over and over and over, until Jessica came to the rescue and they all went to the beach! That’s the thing about California – you can always use the beach for a distraction!

Rachel and Brian enjoyed a week at Sundance recently, too – so now Dad is thinking that his (I’m not taking credit for the idea by using ‘our’) kids should buy the cabin so we can get ready for a mission. Maybe you’d all like to buy a beach house, too, as well as a 53 acre farm, and a few other things, too!

Jeremiah told us he dropped the ‘L’ bomb, if you know what that is. If you don’t, just give him a call and get informed. He is making plans for a summer in Washington DC interning for Price/Waterhouse/Coopers, even though he doesn’t see accounting in his career future. Julie was hoping for some volunteer service in India at the Rising Star orphanage this summer until she found out that volunteering cost big bucks so it probably won’t happen. She is considering a very attractive option in Southern California as a part-time game partner for Lucy and full time worker for money which at this stage in her life could be vital to her survival.

I am missing all of the little angels back in GA and some big angels, too. Emily is quite amazing to watch in action – she has definitely mastered multi-tasking. She is also in the process of becoming ‘less’ – does anyone every want to become less of something? Claire is helping making the year 2009 an expansion success by announcing grandbaby #24 due in November. Lauren in January, Amelia in March, baby Allred in Nov. I’m thinking that could be it for 2009, but I would like to be proved wrong. Could one grandma ever be surrounded by too many angels?....not a chance!

And now for a million-dollar ending to this post: name the Three Musketeers below!

Money Rules

If I had remembered to take my new camera to Utah with me last week I could just post some great pictures and not worry about saying much! But since my memory failed me (which is getting to be a rather regular occurrence), my ramblings will be a poor substitute for what could have easily been conveyed visually! With the Sedgwicks at Sundance all week, the temptation to join them for a few days was just too great to resist. I never cease to be grateful for frequent fliers which allow me succumb to such temptations on a last minute’s notice. I was also grateful to be picked up by them in SLC and treated at The Pie, as in pizza pie. They had spent most of the day skiing, then took their family to Temple Square which coordinated nicely with my evening arrival. Jessica now has an iPhone which has, among many things, a GPS system which guided us ‘almost’ right to The Pie – which, by the way, is a University of Utah hot spot, and understandably so – it was very tasty right down to the last cookie crumb of the pizookies. By the time we arrived back at Sundance it was way past everyone’s bedtime, including Grandma Becky who was still on Eastern Time. People weren’t sleeping in on this vacation, though – Madi, Caleb, and Lucy were on the slopes with their mom and dad nearly every day, and every day the skiing/snow was reported to be fabulous. After a skiing lesson or two those kids were taking on the top of the mountain! They did the same with Mexican Train Dominoes – after a lesson or two they conquered the game and were strategizing and beating an old pro….me. Sedgwick geniuses at work. I totally enjoyed observing how the Sedgwicks settled in and took full advantage of the cabin: skiing by day, fireside smores by night and a massage or two squeezed in here and there. They said it was the perfect vacation and I believed them, and I also loved them when they were perfect sports about having to leave two days earlier than planned to accommodate a rental (money rules the cabin, I’m afraid). Still, they had a full week ‘smorzing’ at Sundance and were lucky enough to be able to spend the evicted last two days in Deer Valley with Dave’s brother and his family. Because it was Valentine’s week, Jessica was doing something special for Dave every day – the Seven Days of Valentines which is their tradition. The day before Valentine’s is the BIG one for them – their anniversary. On that day Jessica resisted the slopes and spent the day in Provo setting up a scavenger hunt for Dave that would lead him to all of their favorite haunts from their BYU days. I was glad I was there to play with the kids later that day and into the evening so those two could decipher and track down the clues unhindered. The next morning was crunch time as we had to clean the cabin and get out before we got snowed in and we barely made it! A huge snowstorm had moved in and even with the Pathfinder in 4-wheel, I was slipping and sliding down Timpview Road only to be met by a snowplow coming up the road at full speed totally oblivious to the possibility that another vehicle might be on the road. We missed each other by the hair of our chinny chin chins. That was only the beginning – traffic was backed up Sundance canyon road and moving at snail’s pace. What usually takes 20 minutes (from cabin to Provo) took an hour and half, which made me almost an hour and half late for my hair appointment with Julie. I love having a hair pro in the family and Julie is definitely becoming a pro. Thanks Julie for shaping me up  I was also an hour and half late for an afternoon with Connie before catching my flight, but we did manage Café Rio and a little time for visiting.
Beau during most of my time in UT was in CA with friends and, might I say, his girlfriend, Amy, for the long holiday weekend. We did go together to the Phi Kappa Phi honor society induction, but opted to skip the speakers after a very ordinary but expensive BYU catered meal. I used to love BYU food – I’ve changed my mind (well, I still love their mint brownies!). I do love Beau and won’t be changing my mind on that.
One of the best things about my trip last week was that I was able to route home through Dallas and do a layover for Lauren’s blessing day. She is still as cute as ever and as good as ever. Taylor let me sleep in her bed and Kate told me she didn’t want me to leave. Ahhh, the joys of being a grandma in demand, or at least feeling like you are demand. Josh, Dagmar and family are with the Crofts this weekend – full, fun, lively house there, I’m sure.
I made it back to GA on the first flight out Monday morning, located Gary’s car in the parking lot at the airport, and headed straight to Athens. Jake had a combination rhinoplasty/septaplasty that morning and I got there just in time to give him a big hug on the recovery bed, take him back to his apartment…and pay the bill! At least I thought I was going to pay the bill, but reality hit and I only ‘started’ paying the bill. It was a $20,000 surgery with our insurance only covering 70% after we meet the $3000 deductible (I naively thought the insurance would kick in at 100% after the deductible). I nearly burst into tears at the payment desk
Jake is doing good, in fact, this is what he said:
‘I can't even begin to say how good my nose feels. It is sooooo clear. I'm already breathing really well out of it, and I'm sure it will only continue to get better. It feels amazing. I just want to say thank you to you and Dad so much for allowing me to do this. I can already tell a huge difference. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.’
‘You’re welcome’ – no more billing tears for Jake’s mom. It was worth it.
Sundance seems to be the place to go this winter with Crofts planning for the first week of March and Taskers the last week of March. Keep your fingers crossed that you won’t get displaced in the event of the money rule/rental booking! Just wanted to add some suspense to the planning….
Gary is in Saudi through March 3 and for the next two or three months, he will be home for two weeks, there for two weeks. Money does rule, doesn’t it? We feel blessed that he has this work during a time when a lot of people are out of work, and he is working in a country which isn’t too affected by world economic problems. Over there, oil rules and money flows. The reality of his life there is captured in the one photo for this blog sent by someone who remembered his camera. One picture says it quite well, don’t you think?